Nancy Krueger Gonzalez I'll take the Lyme Rhyme Challenge.
There once was a doctor named Dick
who didn't know a thing about ticks
“There's no Lyme,” he hissed
as his patients ceased to exist.
If you're a doctor, don't be a Dick.
Valerie Mueller
Valerie Mueller, Because of the Lyme Crime I don't have a dime and I feel like shit all the time.
Nancy Krueger Gonzalez There once was a nurse practitioner
who was a Lyme treatment prohibitioner.
“Your Lyme,” she said,
“is all in your head.
Joint inflammation, I find,
is not caused by Lyme.
Your LLMD
has no real degree.
I don't treat via science,
but by IDSA compliance.
It'll be my completement
to disparage your Lyme treatment.”
I said, “Your grammar is bad
and that's really sad.
What's even worse:
You're a terrible nurse.
Until you get half a brain
you should stay in your lane.”
And then I wrote a complaint
Showing saintly restraint,
to the manager of this malpractitioner.
There then was a department inquiry.
(I wrote it all down in my diary.)
The bad nurse was grilled,
her notations were probed,
her ego was chilled,
her bias exposed.
They wrote me a letter of deepest regret,
begged for forgiveness and then they let
me know that her notes were removed from my chart.
They asked if I'm happy. I said, “That's a start.”
But my goal is much larger than this one episode.
I want to destroy their whole anti-Lyme mode.
And to that there is no expiry.